Dear Lame-Ass Printer,

I am attempting to print in black and white. Therefore, the amount of magenta, yellow, and cyan inks I have is completely and totally irrelevant*. The only thing that is relevant is the amount of black ink that is available, and we both know that there is plenty of black ink, so WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?

Hatefully yours,
Fuzzy B. Monkey



*You will be assimilated!