fuzzybluemonkeys: Bootsie (kitty)
So I was trying to get Bootsie to eat the more healthy canned food, and he did okay for the first serving in the morning, but then serving number two when I got home from work he was less interested in but did eventually eat all of it. Unlike his beloved Friskies, however, he'd eat some and then wander off, and then come back and eat some more, and so on. The third and final serving is when hilarity ensued. And it's funny because there have been times when he wouldn't eat at all if he really didn't like something, but this time I knew he would eat it, he just wouldn't be happy about it.
So Bootsie's regular walk is all weird and stompy because of brain damage whatevers, but he was having like, a temper tantrum over this food, and he started stomping really loudly and intentionally and well, petulantly, and it was HILARIOUS because he'd eat a bit of the food, and then stomp all over the kitchen in a snit and then go back and eat some more, followed by *STOMPSTOMPSTOMPSTOMP* followed by more eating.
I don't think me laughing at him was the result he was going for, but that's the result he got. (And I did give him some Friskies once he ate the grain-free stuff.)
fuzzybluemonkeys: (highway)
Is a thing that I've been thinking about?

Like, what if the Second Coming already happened and we're up to the Sixth or maybe even Thirtieth Coming because we just keep killing the poor bastard?

So Jesus it just like completely and totally done, okay? Two thousand years and we're still just as shitty to each other as we've always been except now we live longer, so we have more time in which to be shitty.

So this time around, Jesus is just over it, he can't even work up the energy to be all, How dare you hate people in my name? How dare you kill people in my name?

So he decides to keep a low profile and winds up as an alcoholic (he's not even sure he remembers how to switch off the water into wine thing anymore). And he's basically a crazy homeless dude wandering around muttering to himself, The only sins I'll be dying for are my own, thankyouverymuch.
fuzzybluemonkeys: Bootsie (kitty)
My thoughts while cuddling the Boots:

Bootsie is very warm.
It must be because of his fur.
He's a furnace!

*cackles maniacally*

You're welcome.
fuzzybluemonkeys: fuzzy blue monkey (Default)
...as you do.
And I had the following flight (haha geddit?) of fancy:
Does anyone actually like flight delays? I feel like there must be somebody who, for the sake of human diversity, reacts to a flight delay with unparalleled glee. And they also enjoy traffic jams. Like, if they can't start off their day being stuck in traffic on the way to work, it's just ruined for them. So they have their departure times planned to exactly hit the worst of rush hour traffic, so that they can just bask in the glory of it.

(Though I suppose someone running late might appreciate a flight delay if it means they don't miss their flight.)
fuzzybluemonkeys: fuzzy blue monkey (Default)
"I could liken you to a werewolf" Liken... Lycan... geddit?

In other pun news, Ithaca is Gorges, and I need a job, but I won't find out if I got it until the week of August 20th.
fuzzybluemonkeys: (angry mutant squirrels)
that my first thought upon seeing a student with a highlighter in her mouth on the bus was that in the inevitable Final Destination-esque bus crash, she'd totally wind up with that highlighter coming out through the back of her skull.
fuzzybluemonkeys: (angry mutant squirrels)
If you didn't think the original original super extra depressing lyrics of Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas were quite depressing enough, I've gone ahead and fixed that for you:

Have yourself a merry little Christmas, it may be your last,
Next year we may all be living in the past
Have yourself a merry little Christmas, and believe the lie,
[That] next year we won't all be living just to die.

No good times like the olden days, happy golden days of yore,
Faithful friends who were dear to us, will be near to us no more.

But at least we all will be together*, if the Fates allow,
Until then we'll have to muddle through somehow.
So have yourself a merry little Christmas now.

*in a mass grave

And for some reason, in my head, the movie is a "real" movie and not a SyFy Channel Original, so I'm casting Samuel L. Jackson and Michelle Rodriguez. Dana Davis from Heroes will play a character called Watches because she wears 12 watches on each arm so that she always has all 24 hours of the day going on at once (it's a WarThatNeverEnds**-type dystopia, so mortality is sort of an issue-- and Watches is obsessed with time as a result of growing up in that environment). I'm also killing off Jensen Ackles's character (again.) The more things change the more they stay the same!

I don't have a "plot" per se, but I assure you that the fictional employees of my imaginary production company have an excellent fictional health care package.

**This is the War That Doesn't End,
Yes it goes on and on my friend,
Some people started fightin' it not knowing what it was,
And they'll continue fighting it forever just because
This is the War That Doesn't End...
fuzzybluemonkeys: Evil Hand (zombies)
In honor of the shortest day of the year I turned off all the lights, closed the blinds to block the street lamps, snuggled up with the Boots and my sister-made quilt, and watched 30 Days Of Night.

And as an added bonus Solstice gift: I got an A on that paper that was kicking my ass and have a 4.0 GPA to show for my first semester. (I wasn't really worried about Papermaking and Bookbinding, but it's still like ahhh *sigh of relief* and History of the American Book could have gone either way because the Final Essay and Final Exam were 50% of the course grade, yeesh.)
fuzzybluemonkeys: (highway)
Doesn't everybody have one?

All Along The Watchtower -- Bob Dylan
Only Ashes -- Something Corporate
Bad Moon Rising -- Creedence Clearwater Revival
Eve Of Destruction -- Barry Mcguire
The End's Not Near -- Band of Horses
London Calling -- The Clash
Till My Days Are Through -- Sanders Bohlke
For Whom The Bell Tolls -- Metallica
Fire On The Mountain -- Asa
Didn't It Rain -- Jim Byrnes
How Far We've Come -- Matchbox 20
End Of The World -- Armor for Sleep
It Ends Tonight -- All American Rejects
Santa Monica -- Everclear
Letters From The Sky -- Civil Twilight
Silent Spring -- Blackbird Raum
Everything Goes To Hell -- Tom Waits
It's All Over But The Crying -- Garbage
The Man Comes Around -- Johnny Cash
2525 -- Zager and Evans
Goodnight Saigon -- Billy Joel
One Last Breath -- Creed
Who Will Save Your Soul -- Jewel
Handlebars -- Flobot
Crossfire -- Brandon Flowers
Counting -- Me
I Will Follow You Into The Dark -- Death Cab For Cutie
O Fortuna -- Carl Orff
All Along The Watchtower -- Jimi Hendrix

Not included because Stupid iTunes is stupid and won't let me download a song without downloading Stupid iTunes. I mean, Amazon desperately wants me to download their player, but they let me buy songs without doing so. Do you want my money or not, iTunes?: Till The World Ends -- Jimmy Wong
fuzzybluemonkeys: (dorktastic)
So there's a two volume set called Forty-one Years in India by Lord Roberts of Kandahar, and then there's a single volume Reminiscences of Forty-three Years in India by Sir George Lawrence. And I'm imagining this oneupmanship where Lawrence is all, "Never mind that hack Roberts and his 41 years, I've got 43 years under my belt and I managed to cram it all into one volume, which is easier to read. Long-winded much, Roberts?"
Of course my dramatic interplay is ruined by the fact that the 43 year one was published before the 41 year one (1875 vs. 1897), but the order in which I made the labels was the other way around, so.
fuzzybluemonkeys: Your silliness is noted. (alpha)
I always get a kick out of the "window pain" pun in Eminem's Love The Way You Lie (featuring Rihanna).
fuzzybluemonkeys: (angry mutant squirrels)
Really? Really?

I mean, I'd watch the movie, but really?
fuzzybluemonkeys: Anything you can geek, I can geek greater (geekery)
So, I've been reading Only Begotten Daughter by James Morrow, and it just occurred to me this morning how seasonally appropriate it is what with it being about Decomposing Zombie Jesus's half-sister (on the god side).
So far my favorite part is I wouldn't consider it a spoiler, but just in case. )
And I realize I probably shouldn't find that to be quite so, well... heartwarming, but I'm me, so I do.
fuzzybluemonkeys: winged fuzzy blue monkey (silly)
Today, I replaced the empty roll of red cloth with a full roll of red cloth while listening to "How Deep Is The Red" by Elvis Costello on my mp3 player.
fuzzybluemonkeys: Evil Hand (zombies)
Actual subject line for an actual email to the local FreeCycle group:
"OFFER: 30 jars baby meat in Hamilton Square"
*falls down laughing*
The text of the message does not improve things by clarifying that they mean (presumably) baby food of the jarred meat variety, oh no:
"30 jars of baby meat."
That? Is a lot of dead babies. Then again, those jars are pretty small... and I should really stop now before I start speculating how many jars of baby meat you could get per baby.

In other "nicole is disturbing" news, I have decided to adopt a pet Sharktopus and name him Stanley.


fuzzybluemonkeys: fuzzy blue monkey (Default)

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