adventures in the quest for duncan's innards

i ventured forth from my dwelling place just before the sun reached its zenith in the sky. the heat of the sun warmed the air, but the wind fought back with a cool breeze. expecting the traditional blue and yellow UR schoolbus, i sat in wait. at length it seemed the bus was not coming, but still i continuted waiting in the hope that though i had missed this run, i could catch the next. minutes passed slowly until behold! what is this? one of the public buses will take us to Marketplace Mall? i ascended the stairs cautiously hoping that exact change would not be required of me and it was not. a mere university id would suffice for my travels. however, i was still uncertain. my path remained perilous and unknown. for the bus said Marketplace Mall and mentioned nothing of the Wegman's. rather than risk having my bus trip be for nothing, i disembarked at the mall in the hopes that i could find the vital supplies of duncan's salvation there or in one of its satellite establishments. i commenced with a sojourn by foot to reach the nearby shopping center. daring not to endure the dangers of crossing the highway, my fear prevented me from seeking the Micheal's on its far side. i did, however, find a safer path to Target and took it. alas, once i arrived at Target and searched its numerous shelves i found that my quest was not to be fulfilled. i briefly contemplated buying a pillow and bastardizing it for stuffing, but no. i must remain true and pure of heart if i am to achieve my goal. returning to the vast corridors of the mall i explored the various department stores, knowing all the while that my search was in vain. eventually i came upon a dollar store. here! i said, now my trip will not be for nothing. so at this mecca of singularly priced items, i purchased straight pins to aid me in my struggles. when i sought it out, the bus was waiting for me, and lo, it took me unto Wegman's and i was saved! for the quick walk to Micheal's was nothing to me and i was able to procure the desired stuffing. knowing of the bus's inconvenient tendencies, i stayed and found something i had not quested for but was much welcomed. a monkey. called a funky monkey no less and very pleasing in appearance. though some may consider me weak for it, i am not ashamed of what i did. i ensured that that funky monkey would be coming home with me, $6 being a small price to pay for the pleasure of his smile. then, endeavoring to pass more time, i stopped in a PetCo. there i was able to gaze longingly at the fuzziness of hamsters, gerbils, mice, and ferrets. had it not been for the cost of housing and maintaining the little one, i would surely have gotten a white mouse to accompany me home. the next portions of my journey were largely waiting. finally, the bus returned. however, though i had hoped that the last leg of my journey would be a smooth one, it was not to be. i was forced to stand, clutching desperately to the provided pole, which turned my hand a blackish color, as i valianty fought centrifical and gravitational forces. upon reaching the place from which i had first ventured into the unknown, i knew my journey was almost at an end. stopping at the Corner Store, i purchased several key provisions including a pint of Chubby Hubby ice cream. did you know that Chubby Hubby ice cream contains 'fudge covered peanut butter filled pretzels in vanilla malt ice cream with fudge and peanut butter'? i didn't, but i do now. and thus consuming this luscious frozen treat, i found myself participating in this story's happy ending.