fuzzybluemonkeys: (angry mutant squirrels)
You know that's totally gonna be a movie someday, even if it's a craptastic made-for-TV SyFy original à la Anacondas 3 & 4. But really, who doesn't want to see David Hasselhoff eaten by a giant snake zombies?
Anyway, 28 years ago today, the Nicole Virus was unleashed upon the Earth in order to come up with ideas like The Dam of Human Flesh (created by Killer Beavers who gnaw off people's legs like they're tree stumps).

You're welcome.
fuzzybluemonkeys: (highway)
(Yes, I realize that this joke would have worked better last year, but I didn't think of it then. Also, I don't think you had seen the movie yet at that point.)


The Zombies would like to eat you like you are birthday cake wish you a Happy Birthday! (and then eat you like you are birthday cake.)

Happy Birthday Shallerdoodle!
fuzzybluemonkeys: fuzzy blue monkey (truth)
Yesterday's Shirt: "ZOMBIE eat flesh"
Yesterday's Movie: Zombieland, FunnyAwesome.

Today's Shirt: "The Boogie Man Is Afraid Of Me"
Today's Movies: Dawn of the Dead(remake), VingRhamesAwesome.
Land of the Dead, RootForTheZombiesAwesome.
Quarantine, CreepyAwesome.
fuzzybluemonkeys: fuzzy blue monkey (dork)
I am taking Vacation Days this Thursday and Friday for the sake of my sanity, and since it's Halloween and I've got a whole lot of unwatched DVDs courtesy of Swaptree (I ♥ Swaptree): it's time for a horror movie marathon!

My only definite plans so far are:
Thursday: Go to the movie theater to see a Zombieland matinee,
and Saturday: Watch Army of Darkness during the usual SciFi Saturday timeslot because SyFy is playing some Ghost Hunters gobbledy-gook instead of a crappy movie.

My options for the rest of the marathon are as follows:

Never seen:
-Cloverfield
-Quarantine
-Land of the Dead
-Altered
-Chronicles of Riddick
-The Faculty

Never seen in a non-EditedForTV capacity:
-Dawn of the Dead(Remake)
-Identity
-Pitch Black
-The Forgotten
-Frequency

Seen, but I could always watch it again *cough*ArmyofDarkness*cough*:
-Night of the Living Dead
-Dawn of the Dead(Original)
-Cursed
-Ginger Snaps
-The Mummy

Seen more recently, so will probably skip:
-Underworld
-Slither
-Shaun of the Dead
fuzzybluemonkeys: fuzzy blue monkey (truth)
How does this work?
Well, it goes a little something like this:

Me: What do you think about Zombies vs. Werewolves?
Me: I think the inevitable Zombie Werewolf would be AWESOME!
Me: But would it be the result of a Zombie getting wolfed out by a Werewolf bite, or a Werewolf getting zombified by a Zombie bite?
fuzzybluemonkeys: fuzzy blue monkey (Default)
The diamond may be my birth stone, but I'm still not inclined to give a royal drenn about them (other than the laser aspect because: lasers!)(not to mention the depressing "people died for those" aspect). Zombies, on the other (potentially evil) hand, are awesome.
So, yeah, I wasn't overly familiar with the song when my sister gives me the phrase "Zombies Are A Girl's Best Friend" courtesy of Skip cutting out something from a magazine or something. And the only line (melodically) that I really knew was that one, so I immediately started singing it that way. Then I had to learn the rest of the song. And fix the rest of the lyrics. But I am finally finished.

Zombies!

Crass Materialism!

There are many kinds of dead.
Some delight in drinking blood.
But I prefer a man who trips
And drips all sorts of crud.

A bite on the neck
May be quite interdental,
But zombies are a girl's best friend.

A chainsaw for a hand
Can be quite instrumental
When a missing head
Will save you from the Evil Dead.

Corpses grow cold
As they grow old,
And we all decompose in the end.

But shuffling and stumbling,
The best ones are crumbling.
Zombies are a girl's best friend.

Raimi's!
Braaaains!
Ving Rhames!
Bruce Campbell!
Talk to me George Romero.
Tell me all about it!

There may come a time
When a full moon is shining,
But zombies are a girl's best friend.

There may come a time
When you find yourself pining
For a werewolf pet,
But you'll be likely to regret.

He's got pull
When moons are full,
But all phases must come to an end.

And hey, if you're rotting
There's no time for plotting.
Zombies are a girl's best friend.

I've heard of affairs
That are strictly demonic,
But zombies are a girl's best friend.

There may be a cure
In a potion or tonic
Or light of sun
But if it's fleeting where's the fun?

Time rolls on,
And life is gone,
And rigor mortis won't let you bend.

But stiff back
Or stiff knees,
So long as he's dead, please.

Zombies! Zombies!
I don't mean diamonds!
But zombies are a girl's best friend.
The French are glad to die for love.
They delight in fighting duels.
But I prefer a man who lives
And gives expensive jewels.

A kiss on the hand
May be quite continental,
But diamonds are a girl's best friend.

A kiss may be grand
But it won't pay the rental
On your humble flat
Or help you at the automat.

Men grow cold
As girls grow old,
And we all lose our charms in the end.

But square-cut or pear-shaped,
These rocks don't loose their shape.
Diamonds are a girl's best friend.

Tiffany's!
Cartier!
Black Starr!
Frost Gorham!
Talk to me Harry Winston.
Tell me all about it!

There may come a time
When a lass needs a lawyer,
But diamonds are a girl's best friend.

There may come a time
When a hard-boiled employer
Thinks you're awful nice,
But get that ice or else no dice.

He's your guy
When stocks are high,
But beware when they start to descend.

It's then that those louses
Go back to their spouses.
Diamonds are a girl's best friend.

I've heard of affairs
That are strictly platonic,
But diamonds are a girl's best friend.

And I think affairs
That you must keep liaisonic
Are better bets
If little pets get big baguettes.

Time rolls on,
And youth is gone,
And you can't straighten up when you bend.

But stiff back
Or stiff knees,
You stand straight at Tiffany's.

Diamonds! Diamonds!
I don't mean rhinestones!
But diamonds are a girl's best friend.




































































Marilyn Monroe singing about crass materialism: Words by Jule Styne and music by Leo Robin
Me singing about zombies: Words by me (with help from Shal) and music by Leo Robin except I did it a capella cuz I don't have Archie tech. (And I skipped the talky part cuz it sounds really stupid when I do it.)

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