Test 1, 2, 3.

Leave them a note telling them that they are awesome.


Someone saw my [still under construction] TARDIS book and left this note:

And because I was sewing some with embroidery floss, I have decided that endbands are like friendship bracelets for books.

Eventually, when The Hobbit movie[s] come out on DVD, I'll be expecting a fanvid set to Leonard Nimoy's The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins.
Fair warning.

(I'd also like to see Benedict Cumberbatch serenading Martin Freeman with the song, but I think that's a bit less likely.)

( Let's start at the very beginning. A very good place to start. )

Let me sum up: 20 episodes of Rod Serlingy goodness with 6 of those never before seen by me. And as an added bonus, I didn't get interrupted by wrestling (for shame, SyFy, for shame!).


*Okay, 99.9% less because they've got ads for other CBS shows on at the time like Wanted Dead or Alive starring Steve McQueen and The Danny Thomas Show.

My mind leaks like a sieve
Releasing all the things I thought I knew
Replacing them with new ideas to lose
My eyes see blind as bats
So not at all
I hear
Sounds
Like a riot
Loud and louder and loudest
Someone misplaced the apocalypse
Again.


I sorta feel like the last two lines should be the beginning of a different poem/story, but I don't know what happens next.

Yesterday's Shirt: "ZOMBIE eat flesh"
Yesterday's Movie: Zombieland, FunnyAwesome.

Today's Shirt: "The Boogie Man Is Afraid Of Me"
Today's Movies: Dawn of the Dead(remake), VingRhamesAwesome.
Land of the Dead, RootForTheZombiesAwesome.
Quarantine, CreepyAwesome.

And I do:



But it fails as a holiday card cause it's too damn hard to mass produce.

So sometimes that lullabye about how Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird starts running through my head. The trouble is that I only know the opening lyrics:

Hush, little baby, don't say a word,
Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird,
And if that mockingbird won't sing,
Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring...

And that is the point where I forget what comes next and start making shit up:

And if that diamond ring should crack,
Mama's gonna buy you a Cadillac,
And if that Cadillac won't start,
Mama's gonna buy you a beating heart,
And if that beating heart should stop,
Mama's gonna buy you a traffic cop,
And if that traffic cop should die,
Mama's gonna buy you an apple pie,
And if that apple pie should rot,
Mama's gonna buy you a cooking pot,
And if that cooking pot should burn,
Mama's gonna buy you a flowered urn,
And if that flowered urn should break,
Mama's gonna buy you a wooden stake,
And if that wooden stake should split,
Mama's gonna buy you a first aid kit,
And if that first aid kit won't heal,
Mama's gonna buy you a spinning wheel,
And if that spinning wheel should prick,
Mama's gonna buy you a fried drumstick,
And if that drumstick clogs your veins,
Mama's gonna buy you a flying plane,
And if that flying plane should crash,
Mama's gonna buy you some V8 Splash,
And if that V8 Splash should spill,
Mama's gonna buy you a daffodil,
And if that daffodil should wilt,
Mama's gonna buy you a highland kilt,
And if that highland kilt should tear,
Mama's gonna buy you a grizzly bear,
And if that grizzly bear won't growl,
Mama's gonna buy you a hooting owl,
And if that hooting owl won't hoot,
Mama's gonna buy you some drugs to shoot,
And if those drugs don't make you high,
Mama's gonna buy you tsetse fly,
And if that tsetse fly should bite...

This is why it's really for the best that what little maternal instincts I have are directed at cats.

How does this work?
Well, it goes a little something like this:

Me: What do you think about Zombies vs. Werewolves?
Me: I think the inevitable Zombie Werewolf would be AWESOME!
Me: But would it be the result of a Zombie getting wolfed out by a Werewolf bite, or a Werewolf getting zombified by a Zombie bite?

He was totally there!
Live and in person!
Neither evil nor dead!
Well, maybe a little evil.


See that orange blob in the front there?

Bruce Campbell!
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
*ahem*
The stressful city driving and visibility-impairing rainy foggish nightmare and Curbs of Doom and obnoxious squealing fanbelt were all totally worth it. Because I got to see My Name is Bruce which was hilarious and awesome and so very, very meta and Ted Raimi and a Shatner-insult for the win! And then the totally awesome Bruce Campbell himself came out for Q&A and it was awesome.

What with wracking my brain for all that it might remember about Transfomers yesterday, I sorta noticed the I'mSurprisedTheyDidn'tSue level of similarity between Megatron and Megazord from Power Rangers (both in name and general transformationiness).
This then got me thinking about Power Rangers in general, and how even though we made fun of it a lot (I'm sure Shoshona would be just shocked to learn this), we still watched it.
And then it occurred to me that either my enjoyment of Power Rangers was an early sign of my current fondness for cheese/craptastic scifi movies, or watching it in my more formative years somehow innoculated me against the horrors of "acting" so atrocious it needs to be put in quotes and cardboard special effects.

John Connor has to send Kyle Reese back in time so that Reese can impregnate his mother and Connor can exist and be so instrumental in saving the human race from annihilation that the machines send a Terminator back in time to kill his mother (thereby preventing John from existing), such that John must send Reese back to save Sarah Connor and, in the process, father him.

Oh, and when the Terminator has all the fleshy Arnold bits burned off of him, the animation is so Raimi skeleton. Hee!

This occurred to me a few days ago, and I figure it fits with rydra_wong's CoC meme, so:
Hoshi Sato is quite possibly the most influential character in all of Star Trek canon.
*cue spit takes*
Say what now?

You know that [plot] device on Star Trek? The one that allows every alien in the entire fucking universe to speak English? That helpful little gizmo that prevents them from having to spend every episode learning a new language? (Way to drop the ball [Ba'al?] on explaining that one, Stargate series.)
Never mind that the idea is impossible; a program that instantly translates a language to English even if it's never been heard before. This is Science Fiction, the believability of the device doesn't change the fact that she fracking invented it, or that everybody on Star Trek uses it pretty much at all times.
And that is why Hoshi Sato is just as important as Zefram Cochrane in terms of creating the basic infrastructure upon which the Trek-verse functions.

Sure, TPTB couldn't seem to decide if she was gonna be meek or a badass (though I, personally, vote badass because, dude, she had Ceti Eels compliance-inducing parasites injected into her head, and not only did she not help the Xindi unlock their big-ass weapon and destroy Earth, she added another layer of encryption. While under the influence of Ceti Eels mind-altering parasites.
Sure, a second dose of Ceti Eels, has her cracking all the codes, but still.)

So, basically, no matter what stupid shit the writers did to the character (UT translation: no matter how bad Enterprise got), she is an awesome badass who allows there to be communication throughout the Trek-verse, and everyone would be screwed without the sometimes space-sick, but totally awesome linguist. And yes, my BA in Linguistics makes me prejudiced in her favor, what of it?

Plus, it's an excuse to post this really pretty picture of Linda Park:

(I also made an icon out of it, but it's not like that was hard-- the original pic is 200x200, so I didn't even have to crop, just resize)

Okay, so the title could use some work, but here's my idea for a cheesetastic SciFi Saturday Original:
Bruce Campbell (who else?) stars as a bitter factory worker who for years has turned a blind eye to the improper chemical disposal the company he works for engages in. Finally, fed up with his job, he decides to squeal to the EPA (the fictional EPA who actually gives a crap). Bruce is about to get fired for his whistle-blowing ways when the Angry Mutant Squirrels (caused by the chemical dumping, obviously) attack!
Meanwhile, the EPA has sent a jaded, but highly-principled agent (played by Sean Patrick Flanery) to investigate. When he gets to the factory, the Angry Mutant Squirrels have overrun the place, and just when it seems like he is doomed to be eaten alive by Angry Mutant Squirrels, Bruce Campbell appears to save him (utilizing various factory implements and tools).
Together, they will face the horde of Angry Mutant Squirrels, and they will be awesome. And also gay. Hey, it's my movie-- besides, I can't stray too far from the formula here. There's usually either the established couple whose relationship is put to the test, or the new couple that forms based on shared near-death experiences. What better place for romance than amidst the onslaught of Angry Mutant Squirrels?

I'm only a fifth of the way through the book, and I sincerely hope I turn out to be wrong (because as is, I think George Lucas could sue).

So, we open with an elf (who may well be a princess) trying to outrun the agents of an evil empire (which is actually referred to as "the Empire"-- maybe it will be doing some striking back at some point?). She is caught by said agents, but not before she sends the thing they're after to safety. The thing they're after? A blue stone that we later learn is a dragon's egg, but may as well be the plans to the freakin' Death Star.
And where does she send it? Why, to the sparsely inhabited Spine. But it's wintry there! It's nothing like Tatooine! Well, except for that orphaned farm boy being raised by his aunt and uncle.
And obviously, he's the one who finds the plans, er, egg, and has a chat about it with ol' Ben Kenobi, er, Brom the Storyteller, who may or may not be a former Rider (a Jedi by any other name would be as ripped off).
And let's not forget the backstory of the Empire-- long ago Jedis (Riders) used the Force (Dragons) to maintain peace and order, but then one of them went to the Dark Side (or, in this instance, batshit crazy), and thus the evil Empire is ruled by corrupt Riders (a Sith Lord by any other name... you get the idea).
So anyway, back to our orphan farm boy whose mother is sketchy at best, and whose father is so gonna turn out to be King Galbatorix (leader of the evil Empire). If his father is not Lord GalbaVader, I will be pleasantly surprised.
Anyhoodle, GalbaVader's minions go searching for the missing plans to the Death Star, and wind up blowing up the farm and dearest Uncle Owen/Garrow with it (Auntie had already died previously [and he has a cousin!], which makes it so totally different right? Right?).
So now that we've severed all ties to family and home (which I admit, is not limited to Star Wars), let's go on a quest for revenge with old Ben, er, Brom. And this Brom fella, he knows an awful lot about the Riders of yore. Not only is he well-versed in the ways of the Force (he can speak to Eragon's dragon), but he even gives Er-Luke-agon a nifty and powerful sword that used to belong to a Rider. If it turns out Brom is not a former Rider, I will be pleasantly surprised.