Prison Break Argues Its Case

"I'm a good show!"
Well...
"I'm a decent show?"
Dude, I totally didn't even know you were on last night.
"But you're upset that you missed me, right?"
Well, I mean, I'm curious as to how they get out, but I don't really care about the show.
"But you care about how they get out!"
Yeah, but I can read the recaplets to find out what happens. Curiousity satisfied.
"But it's not the same! Written summaries are not an adequate substitute for me! Besides, what are you watching instead, Stargate SG-1 reruns?"
Well, they're new to me.
"Oh, oh, and next Monday is gonna be that miniseries thingy, not even Stargate."
Yeah, but I sorta wanted to watch that.
"You know they'll rerun it. And what does Dark Kingdom have that I don't have?"
Uh... magic, wizards, swordfights?
"I had that devil on the wall thing."
Ooooh.
"And the stain that looked like Jesus- that was supernatural-y."
That was the guy going batshit crazy and instead of having his goons kill the murdering pedophile he had them leave him in a room with the murdering pedophile so the the murdering pedophile could kill him. And now he's in those frightening Volkswagen commercials.
[shudders]"Point."
Yeah.
"But come on, you know you liked the throat slitting scene. You love throat slitting scenes!"
True. But you killed Marilyn. Killing cats is hard to come back from.
"So what you're saying is that I have to kill someone with liquid nitrogen in order for you to watch me again?"
Pretty much.
"Come on, you watched me for several episodes after I killed Marilyn- the only reason you stopped was because FOX stopped airing new ones."
Yeah, but I mean there was nothing for such a long time, and I was fine with it. It's not like Supernatural or Battlestar Galactica where I really miss it while it's gone.
"Are you trying to tell me that you anxiously await each new episode of Law & Order? You don't even watch the mothership anymore!"
I miss Briscoe.
"Me too."
He was so awesome.
"Yeah- hey! Stop distracting me! Briscoe was never even on me!"
Fair enough. But you still haven't convinced me that I need to start watching you again.
"What about the pretty? You like the pretty!"
Well, Wentworth ain't painful to look at, and the guy that plays Sucre is also nice, but again, I missed last night's episode, and I'm really just not all that concerned about it, which sorta indicates a lack of interest, ya know?
"But you're having trouble letting go, or else we wouldn't be having this conversation!"
Yeah, I need to think about it.
"Fine. Be that way."
I will, thank you.
"Bitch."
Whore!
"Okay, now you're just being ridiculous."